Faculty Member Gifts

Washington Crossing the Delaware, Having Been Invited to Join the Faculty at Princeton

"Now, just to review, at the last faculty meeting we established that Marcia hates Fred, Fred hates Carol and Marcia, Carol and Larry despise me, and I hate Larry, Marcia, Fred and Penny."

"I hereby bring to order this Sunday session of the Faculty Senate."

"May I remind the faculty that, in the event of a nuclear strike, atom bombs take a gender-neutral pronoun."

They Too

Campus. Professor Frump is the most respected faculty member here. All the other professors want to be noticed by him. This semester he's teaching three classes. But for some unknown reason lots of students are dropping the second one. He asked why this is happening. Hoping to impress him, sociology and economics scholars rushed to present him with their theories. I guess he should have been more specific when he questioned with the middle class is disappearing.

The Janitor at the Harvard University Alumni Reunion is one of the Gang.

Tooth fairy telling new students that she is the Head of Dentistry at their University

"Ladies and gentlemen, this lecture is for stimulation purposes only."

'You are so just not simply an anecdotal reference in an oversized college textbook. Of course, you know that.'

"I'm basically a Rimbaudist, but with a little Ferlinghetti thrown in on my father's side."

Dr. Shepard finds the Harvard Faculty Club cool to his lunch pyjamas.

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Welcome to the future"

Ethics exam cheater.

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

Big Bang Theory.

Albert Einstein

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"