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"She says she's got squatters rights."

'Goliath's Achilles Heel.'

With horror he realised he was playing the wrong tune...

The Fox and the Crow.

Invisible clothes

'Are you made of sugar?'

"Let me take this call: Go ahead, I'll catch up..."

"Eat my dust!"

The Popularity of Pickleball Inspires a New Wave of Hybrid Sports.

Your enemy is defeated by Fate

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

'Yes Mr Hare, you were right: He IS on steroids!'

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

Need a vitaminlike pill, but don't want to risk the side effects? Then try the world's first multivitamin placebo! They don't do any good, but they don't do any harm either.

Birds doing the 'wave'.

'The next case Your Honor, is a palimony suit. The ant vs the grasshopper.'

'Have you tried a licensed health practicioner?'

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

"Your grandma and I have decided to live together."

"Cut down on the pumpkin spice."

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

'Thanks to the internet, I can telecommute a few days a week now: I don't need to waste so much time travelling...'

'Please, Grandpa Turkey! Tell us about the Christmas massacre and the Thanksgiving bloodbath!'

Hare tells tortoise: 'Remembe the plan: on the final stretch, you go down.'

"Oh, Lord! Not another wine-and-cheese party!"

Purple Fairy

"They're perfect astronauts. Fast velocity followed by a long, slow pace."

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

"Face it, Tim, that cute little Pet Rock you bought in 1976 is now a full-grown boulder - it's time to set him free!"

"I think feeling a certain amount of anxiety over the up coming race with the Hare is perfectly normal!"

Aesop's Fables: The Fox and the Crow

The tortoise and hare