Extraterrestrial Ambassador Gifts

'We've been sent to establish a dialog with this planet's dominant life form. Where's your cat?'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

Hair Crop Circle

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

How am I abducting?

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

Watch the skies: UFO buffs all stare at the sky, yet alien is amongst them.

'Hello Mr Preston? This is an ALIEN speaking. We have landed in your paddock. We have mutilated your cows. We have made loud crashing noises...what the hell is on your TV that's so special?'

"What the hell, sweetheart―if you want it, it's yours!"

"Wow! You do have a triple A membership!"

Elevator Music

'Look! There's a Zyzzkzkk!'

"A glimpse into a cartoon character's dressing room..."

An alien tries to hitch a lift at the side of the road

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

"My world is Tribeca, lars, and yours is a different world."

Giorgio A. Tsoukalos - Ancient Aliens

Are you interested in UFOs? Advanced life forms? Free medical screenings? Alternative underwear? Snacks and refreshments? Non-sexual turtles? Reverse pound cake? Science? Join us.

' Can I borrow change for the bus? With the cost of gas, I just can't justify buzzing around the city in that thing.'

Welcome: Skeptics Society

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'