Experimental Enthusiast Gifts

"Switch with me. I need to get into medical school."

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

"I want to keep it."

"Let's face it, Henshaw, we were not cut out to be genetic engineers."

'Sure, the term 'lab rat' has a lot of negative connotations but having drugs tested on you isn't so bad if you're a hypochondriac...'

'Well, we turned water into wine. Anyone remember how?'

Research Lab - "Oh go on then, you know me, I'll try anything once"

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

"See - it works in my fantasy research league."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point.' Tennyson.'

Wilhelm Rontgen's first attempt at X-rays: shining a bright light through Madame Rontgen.

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

"Yeah, the Jekyll and Hyde thing is weird, but if I play it right, I get fed twice."

"Nihilistic customer service"

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

Plasma Ball

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

Interpretive napping

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

Business Sisyphus

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

It's an experiment.

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

'What'll I do with the nuclear wastes?'

An angry Scientist has discovered his two Lab' mice are using a GPS to find their way through a maze to some cheese.

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

'Okay I admit it - we probably do need a rocket scientist.'

City Bar and Grill - "Stop worrying, youth and enthusiasm can't compete with experience and treachery."

Undercover Biophysicists

"But I'm conducting an experiment: will the twentieth cookie taste as good as the first?"

'I thoguht they only tested drugs on guinea pigs.'