Experiment Junkie T-Shirts

'We've really come up with something, but nine other labs also came up with it this week.'

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

'If he grabs the broccoli, we turn on the Raffi tunes. If he heads towards the Playstation, he hit him with the air horn at 100db.'

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point.' Tennyson.'

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

Wilhelm Rontgen's first attempt at X-rays: shining a bright light through Madame Rontgen.

"I am not asking for directions."

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

"Wait -- I have an app that creates a napkin to write the contract terms on."

"Liife! Give my conversation Liife!"

Plasma Ball

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

It's an experiment.

'The next big thing is ultra nano.'

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

'What'll I do with the nuclear wastes?'

An angry Scientist has discovered his two Lab' mice are using a GPS to find their way through a maze to some cheese.

'I hunt and I gather. I invented multitasking.'

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

'Okay I admit it - we probably do need a rocket scientist.'

"Actually, I worked my way up from ideas and you can too!"

'I thoguht they only tested drugs on guinea pigs.'

"So, gentlemen.... By investing in this time vortex manipulator, we will be able to cross the bridges before we come to them."

'Here's one I made earlier.'

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

"This is genius, Ted. We can't use it. Nobody will believe I thought of it."

Undercover Biophysicists