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Culture clash

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

Countervailing Clichés.

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'How is the water prepared?'

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'Oops! It's usually the devil to get any to come out!'

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"For drinks or dinner?"

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

'The customer is always right...'

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

Dave's Hamburger Shop

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

I like the look of the sherry trifle!

"It's the Chef Surprise."

'Your tea is getting cold.'

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

'Careful, the plate is really hot.'

Jewish man walks into a restaurant called 'Oy Sushi'.

'You made me jump,'

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

'Not yet! Wait until he hits the breaking point... we just gave him some warm, soft bread and the cold, hard butter... THEN we bring out the flimsy plastic knife.'