Exhausted Jesters Pillows

'In a minute...'

"I hate performance review season."

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

"Intern? Oh, no. He wandered in from our day care center."

"Any other skills?"

Rodins rotten juggler

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

Pumping up wig in blender.

'Be careful. The plate is hot!'

Jeff hated performance reviews.

"Let's see how brave you are without your gun."

Parenting is... watching them sleep.

Tercentary of Shakespeare's Birth

Vat Nav

"Sir, Sparky is here for his 3:00 pm throw."

'He must be the real Santa... He was the only sober guy at the Xmas party!'

'I ran with them once.'

"I'll have my people call your people."

'How do you like this one?...Inflatable dart board.'

Work/Life Balance.

'What do you think I'm doing? The doctor told me to collect a mid stream urine specimen."

The end of the world is at hand: '10... 9... 8... 7...'

Don't be such a poor loser. You knew this would happen when you lost the Flopsies account !

"It's creepy the way they play with their food."

"Even though I wasn't making a big salary, I always saved ten percent of my messages."

"Every Christmas you make a lot of primises you never keep, why don't you become a politian."

£150,000 Per Annum - Daydreaming again, Foster?

'What with Obama and all his giveaways, I'm surprised you're still in business.'

"It's not as easy as it looks."

'Uh-oh, here comes my wife. Just act natural.'

'What is he fishing for?'

'You don't need to remind them every time that the bubble's going to burst.'