Exercise Jokers T-Shirts

"My New Year's resolution is to get fit and watch more TV."

'He's started jogging to work.'

'I do try to walk more! The donut shop is a good 1/2 block further tan the health food store!'

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

Staff. Manager. So then you must say "I refuse to lift weights." Hey, that's not what I expected when I hired you to be a resistance training instructor!

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

Tortoise and hare on treadmills.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

'His 5 hour energy drink timed out. If only he had taken it 3 seconds later.'

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

Pelobong

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

The nutritional devils and angels on your shoulder.

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

"Yeah. I'm into fitness. Fittin' dis whole sammich in my mouth."

Musclesnakes just swallow the dumbbells.

'I understand the concept, sir, but I think I'd do better if it were a donut.'

"I agree, it is important to look good, but wearing high heels during a workout may be a little counter productive."

Please seat to be weighted.

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1,273,426 steps."

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

"At least you made it into the hallway."

5. Install all equipment carefully. 6. Never increase the weight load of any exercise machine when you are by yourself.

'When did the treadmill replace the rat race?'

"Sometimes a tightness in the chest can be a sign of high blood pressure. In your husband's case, however, I just loosened his belt a little."

"I feel so much more relaxed since I punched out my yoga instructor!"

'If I get dizzy, and pass out there's a cherry danish in my lunch box.'

"I'm not finished exercising. I still have a couple of laps to go."

'I thought you needed some exercise, so I packed 800 pounds of weights in your backpack.'

"He said, 'Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?' I thought that meant steer."