Exasperated Eater Gifts

Access Denied!

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

Sm. Pepperoni & Mushroom Cloud

'Thank goodness for clumsy children: A spilt ice-cream!'

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"I'm unable to process this image."

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

Children's Dream Dinners: Superhero Special

Pizza with Extra Extra Cheese.

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

"What's cookin', Tia Carmen?"

"Habanero ..."

"Tastes great, less killing!"

'I really love this stuff, but I still have a lot of trouble with sushi.'

'Have you been using that Hairy Bikers cookbook again'

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse! You've come to the right place.

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

"What's the 'Chef's Surprise'? That's his reaction when you actually eat it."

'It's an acquired taste!'

Roadkill Restaurant

"Trust me, it tastes good – you won’t like it."

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

"Jeffrey eats everything, Mom, because no one has told him what he doesn't like."

"I'm all for the internet of things - but I hate pop-up ads."

'O.K. Smarty Pants, here's your fish, cheese, egg, strawberry jam and pickle sandwich with a topping of ice cream and mustard. Pay up!'

*Not suitable for those with an allergy to consciousness expansion

'I think we should eat out in the hotel tomorrow dear.'

"Throw the rope!! It's a quicksandwich!!"