Ex Dodgers T-Shirts

"Row faster, Manny- I just spotted my ex."

Fear of news.

"When you hear me begin talking about our lousy sales figures, you guys create a distraction."

"I can help you get your finances back in shape – you've just got to believe in me."

"Son, I’d say the ACL tear is the least of your problems."

'Another hike in college tuition! The costs are already killing my folks!'

Gone for Broke College

"Thanks for the offer... but I'd rather see if tech support can get my computer running."

"Can you send me a text so I can use it as a ruse to get out of this conversation?"

"Whoever guesses which cup the college tuition is under, gets it."

"We're not celebrities, and we don't want to get out of here..."

"If you don't want to know the result of the united game then look away now"

Worm running away from hook.

Personnel. The gap in my resume is when I got turned out on my back for six months.

'No need to put my details in darlin'... You're the girl for me!'

"This is definitely the last time for Chapter Seventeen!"

Money falling down a black hole

"Here's the sick squid I owe you. . ."

'That's it, Darlene -- conserve your energy for the final lap! Stay right in her draft!'

'I've got to go, Alice, you know how the boss frowns on personal calls.'

"I'm meeting with Thor for drinks. He doesn't zoom.

"Your integrity is on the line. Want me to say you're in a meeting?"

'I don't want to read 'Great Books'. Too much pressure.'

"Shadow? Why would I be scared of my shadow? I thought it was the IRS."

Other Walks of Shame

"So I take it you won't be going to the staff Christmas party!"

What she said/What he heard...

Survivors of Near-Flu Experiences

"It's our caseload management system...we just give them more cases until they collapse."

'Ever wonder how you're going to pay off your school loan?'

Dodgers player returning home from finally winning the World Series.

'Hello, Alumni Office? Bad timing. Your fund raising letter arrived with my student loan bills.'

There must be some mistake. I haven't paid off my credit cards yet!

"Sorry, this is the Department of Wrong Places. You want the Bureau of Missed Appointments way-y-y-y-y-y-y down the hall."

'If you don't want to know the scores please exercise your distrust of the BBC now.'