Everyday Tasks Gifts

Yawning at the Laundry

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

The Missing Sock Returns

"I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy." "Which part do you miss most?" "Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what TV shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission?" "Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors."

When laundry ruled the waves.

Kitchen Tetris

"Drunk, yet orderly"

Neighbor Leaf Wars

"Looks like Harriet mixed her lights and darks again."

Woman simutaneously playing the cello and washing man in bath's back

Toothbrush Romance

'Would you like a push Dear?'

"For God's sake, Lucille. We're IN a vacuum."

"You get back here this minute, young man! You're not going anywhere until you clean your room!"

"Hoora! I made it through another day!"

'There's an app you can program to delete your trash? I've had one for years called Dave.'

Pest Control

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

'I'm not going to remind you again, Harold. Now, go get the garbage and bring it in here.'

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'

Separation Anxiety

"So what if they notice a stain? Everyone gets tummy aches. Besides, we’re conserving energy."

Tortoise polishing his shell

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

'Not bad. Already 17 minutes into Saturday morning before I receive my first ultimatum.'

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

'Harold, I told you to take out the trash!'

Child doing the washing up

"I am not ‘politicizing the issue’ — I simply asked you to pick up your room!"

'Sorting the laundry is hell.'

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'