Ethics In Sports Gifts

'There's more to life than winning. . .there's also testing negative for performance enhancing drugs.'

Do Not Feed the Ballplayers Steroids...

Separating steroid users and non-steroid users.

You gave performance enhancing drugs to the girls on the Team Caffeine Hoops Squad?! Mumble. How could you do that? How could you use artificial substances to make them stronger, faster and better athletes? How could you not give me any of the juice? And thus, driven by competitive zeal, society spun out of control. P.S. - To be continued. Next week: A shocking secret!

"These drugs in sports are tearing the game apart."

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

Ethics exam cheater.

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

Squeezing the Free Press.

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

What We Thought Were Canals Are Deep Prejudices and Inequities.

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

'Missed again, eh, Bob? Maybe you should switch to decaf!'

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'Hole in one!!!!'

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

'There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. We're looking for someone who can make all three of these work for us.'

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

Corporate Ethics Department, how may I help you?

'Don't laugh Ms. Newborn, but I want you to proof this for 'accuracy'.'