Eternal Punisher T-Shirts

"Dang...this day feels never ending..."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

'I was fixin' to fill you full o' lead, Clanton, but it looks like that there stalactite done the job for me!'

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

'He never listened to his mother!'

King Pin

"I can't stop thinking about all those available parking spaces back on West Eighty-fifth Street."

Damned if you do...

"What can you tell me about the meaning of death?"

'Always the usher, never the bride.'

'I hate it when teen angst becomes mid-age angst.'

"But don't bother making up a schedule for all those projects. I've got all the time in the world now."

'I'm new up here...where are the men?'

Cemetary memorial shows PIN number never revealed to heirs.

"Never stop learning"

I'm afraid I'm going to have to disciplines you, counselor. No problem, your honor. I just happen to have some furry handcuffs in my pocket.

'He was competitive to the very end.'

"Nope. No mistake. You’ve been booked... forever."

"Wherever he is, I know he'll be upgraded."

"Then it's agreed. Watson, Smith, Teller, and Wilson go to Heaven; Jones, Paducci, and Horner go to Hell; and Fenton and Miller go to arbitration."

'Al was competitive to the end!'

A Tenpin Bowling Pin about to be executed by Bowling balls

"I'd like to let you go, Willy, but this is your third offense."

"What's good here?"

"I'm afraid there's really very little I can do."

"Ding dong ditch is fun, but it's better to watch their reactions when you pretend to be soliciting."

"Guess what? I'm taking an eternity leave."

"Actually, sir, the rules were chiseled in stone."

"My son's going back. Have you anything for a 78 year old."

"Is it my imagination, Moira, or has the clock stopped ticking?"

"Three guesses."

Meredith Smits. Devoted wife, mother and worry wart. Did I leave the iron on?...

'Perpetual Sutdent Syndrome Clinic' Director: R. Chones, BA, MA, PhD, MSW, MBA.

'Too cold at home, too hot here: You can't stop complaining can you?'