Escalators Pillows

Fat woman on escalator - 'It stopped.'

Favoured angels were given a special pass for the 'Lift to Heaven'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"Just for fun today we could fire some eggs around."

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

Offices moved to 23rd floor - taking the company to new heights - the management.

'That's right, we're going all the way to the top floor ... I'm late for a meeting!'

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

Going Down?

Thumbing a Lift.

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

"Ever since the elevator broke down, we've learned that our staff is in desperate need of a fitness program. Especially, since we're only one floor up."

Elevator charge $1.00.

The guy who got in on the ground floor

'Not only did they install an elevator to help you get over the dam, they also hired an elevator operator.'

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

"It's not that I'm lazy. But I envisage myself not so much climbing the corporate ladder, as taking the corporate elevator."

'Apparently, you've purchased another piece of exercise equipment. I think it's time I organised an intervention.'

'I thought this was supposed to be clean fill dirt!'

'What a day! My secretary was out, our biggest customer canceled a large order, the computer broke down, I didn't have any lunch, and leaving work I got stuck for an hour in the elevator with an 18 year old nympho with big breasts!'

Santa Elevator

"This data shows us that we are going up to a new level."

"Can you at least pretend to try and hold the elevator so I won't mull over and over how you didn't hold the elevator."

"I started out with a molehill, then I just kept going."

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

'and for pushing your umbrella button in a VERY crowded elevator.'

'Doors opening.' - 'Doors closing.' - 'Doors bored now.'

A Fork-lift.

'YOU try telling him!'

Sheep Escalator

'Going up?'

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

"This thing is so slow!"