Epic Storyteller Gifts

Achilles often feared that his weakness would be discovered.

Hemingway's dog meets Faulkner's Dog.

Horseback.

"My new book will be an epic novel of the sea."

Better move the hatch. They might be the type to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Sisyphus visits Stowe

The Two Enemy Fleets Clash. (Orlando Furioso).

Sorry we don't do vanity publishing

'...So one day I just decided to walk away from my mortgage and, well... one thing led to another...'

Siegfried and the dragon

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"We only got six days of funding."

Swan Fairy Tales

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

J. R. R. Tolkien

The Demise of Tinkerbell

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

"Eat my dust!"

Warrior Woman

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

"The knights of the round accent table"

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

Phoenix

I wonder what kind of wizard or vampire my husband will be

We never got anything done around here until we invented verbs.

"...And I like how you switched from the first person narrative to third person—impressive." "Thanks."

Santa CGI Effect

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

Odysseus starts regretting his return to Ithaca.

Santa's Helpers