Epic Narrative Lover Gifts

Noah's Ark Sculpture

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

J. R. R. Tolkien

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

Brünnhilde's Funeral Pyre

Three little pigs-mortgage.

'I said, you're supposed to be in the underworld.'

Christopher Nolan caricature

'Two pencils approach Noah's ark.'

'Heathcliff! Oh, Heathcliff!'

Jonah met a strange wooden boy in the belly of the whale.

Edmund Spenser

Virgil

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

'It's a special delivery from 'Troys are us'.'

'Take no notice, he was raided by wolves.'

For the last time, no, I have no wish to add a hotel to my odyssey. Why Odysseus didn't use a travel agent.

Valkyrie.

Anecdote Magazine

Lord of the Rungs: Window Cleaner

Sir Joseph Bowley's

Don Quixote

"Sorry, but your story contains way too much reality!"

Dear Greeks - Our sincere thanks for the giant wooden horse! What a wonderful surprise when we...

David and Goliath and bra-sling

'Well, you sure got your message across to the people THAT time.'

''What I Did During My Summer Vacation -- A Coming of Age Story....''

"Hi honey, I'm Homer!"

Noah and the Flood

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Ohmygosh! What? What? Is a Kardashian here? Major scandal. Epic proportions. Infidelity of the highest order. Sadie Cohen has been cheating on Uncle Mort. Can you believe it? Sadie! The very image of perfection revealed as a fraud! She's not the image of perfection. Stick with me. This is for narrative purposes. Oh, fine. No way! But she's so perfect!

'Sorry Tin Man you have been replaced by a Samsung D800.'

Leviathan is Destroyed (The Holy Bible).

"Limited nuclear war, sir, is where people like you and me survive."

"So, basically you are a socialist."