Enthusiastic Coffee Sipper Gifts

Bearded lady and stiltwalker at breakfast.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

Burning the midnight oil.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

We'll have Manhattans...

Back to work...

"I remember when we first met you were an exhausted young doctor! Now you're an exhausted middle-aged doctor!"

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

"I'm losing my patience with you."

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

"The more coffee I drink, the more these motivational posters make sense."

You've Had Enough!

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

Non-Power Breakfast

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

"I'm trying to lure in Generation X-ers. They're the new sandwich generation. They're sandwiched between caring for their kids and caring for their parents. So they drink lots and lots of coffee."

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

Countervailing Clichés.