Enforcer Gifts

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."

"You're my top enforcer, Donahue, but I have to let you go. The word on the street is cultural appropriation."

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

'No, I will not entertain a motion to suspend the rules!'

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

'Click it or ticket.'

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

No Smoking.

'What a control freak!'

"Let's try the swearing-in process again, and this time, without the high-fives at the end."

'I'd watch this ref, he loves dishing out Punishment.'

I will not waste chalk kid...

Referee cop.

This is your last warning, Jimmy - You break your pinky promise, we break your pinky.

'We're not interested in loyalty,but we do value obedience.'

"Darren Eggleston. I saw that!"

'What you're asking me to do goes against my principles. I'll have to charge extra for that.'

We can't call an ambulance. He doesn't allow personal calls on company time.

'I think we're going to need a compliance officer for these.'

'We only have a few rules around here, but we really enforce them.'

"And if you look to the right you'll see what happens if you disrupt my class."

Mom Umpires

"That's why we wear hard hats"

'It's a whole new twist - a straight-laced detective who does everything by the book.'

"OK...this season, I'm not taking any fooling around...we must have discipline! We must know the rules! We must respect the other team! But mostly...no yelling at the kids, or the coach!"

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

Yomp Trucking Inc...My way or the highway!

"I try to get a head start on them."

'This is a phone poll! Are you in favor of a ban to drive and use a cell phone at the same time?'

'Let's get a few things straight. No speed reading, no silly voices, no skipping pages...'

'I love doing surprise inspections.'

'Building Inspectors During Their Off Hours.'

Super hero enforces handicapped parking law.

'It's from the Federal Trade Commission -- we have to put in a non-smoking section.'

"You're a very good hall monitor, Billy, but we don't detain teachers."