Emerging Market Adventurers Gifts

'Based on your travels, what would you say is the greatest potential downside, if any, to investing in the Upper Amazon?'

Profit

"Dow's up!"

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

Self-employed.

'Today, emerging market funds rose on news the American dream is alive and well in Thailand, Singapore, China. . .'

Stock Market Roller-coaster.

"Gas, is it the future?"

'There's a bear on line one and a bull on line two. Who do you want me to put through first?'

'Stocks fell on the news that whatever can go wrong, usually does go wrong.'

The Day Trader

'So glad we ticked the no publicity box.'

'I hear you're looking for bounty hunters...'

'How did your big investment go, dear?'

Stock Hurricane Ride

"Well, this must be as big as I'm supposed to get."

'What's the difference between exchange-traded derivatives and swaps?'

"Day trading? What's made in a minute is lost in a second."

"The shareholders were planning to finance your trip to space until they learned that you were expected to return."

"Admittedly, it is a bit of a 'fixer upper'."

"This little piggy got totally screwed by the market."

'It turns out it wasn't an Internet scam after all. It was just a really bad investment idea.'

"Are your chickens raised without the use of growth hormones?"

"There's no limit to what you can do with your life. Just look at me - I'm a chicken who ordered a beer."

Investor walks tightrope graph balancing risk and reward.

'This fortune cookie says, 'You will have good luck investing in emerging markets, fortune cookie & Chopstick Trading Company of Singapore.''

New York Stock Exchange: Feed the bears at your own risk.

'Yeah. It was a good day.'

"But Tim has tremendous faith in modern technology...he's looking for an 'Foolproof pension investment strategy in uncertain markets and a potentially imploding Eurozone' app!"

'No sir, I'm afraid there isn't a patron saint for investors.'

At last he was ready to plug into online job search.

Investor's Nightmare.

Investments: thrill-seekers welcome.

"The new position not only comes with a bump in salary, but allows me to extend my reach into areas where I'm not qualified."