Emergency Vehicle Enthusiast Pillows

'So do you want one with an accelerator, or one with brakes?'

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

Being Serenading in Casualty

"Let me through – I'm morbidly curious!"

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

"First save Mister chomp-chomp!"

'Relax. This is only a test.'

Tsunami Evac Route

"The blaze has taken hold on the eight floor Chief. The C.E.O., V.P. and C.O.O. are trapped in the boardroom!!"

Paramedics.

"My God, now what?"

We can't call an ambulance. He doesn't allow personal calls on company time.

Fire Backwards.

Break Glass in Case of Fire: Tiny Firemen.

'Kitchen! Chicken Bone! Hurry!!' - Rent-A-Surgeon

'Oh - It's you.'

"I've got a pulse!"

Why dogs hate CPR.

'Aunt Joan and Uncle Wally took Luci to the emergency room.'

'Maintenance to the O.R....Maintenance to the O.R....'

'Now, lift and squeeze the diaphragm.' ... 'Sweet.'

'I'm a doctor... This man needs someone who can grant me immunity from liability, and FAST!'

"Quick! Turn the siren on!"

Hospital: Accident and Emergency and On Purpose and Suffering Nicely.

'Hold it, you can cancel that STAT call.'

"We ran into a marathon."

"He fought like hell."

'Please, everyone, stand back to give the register some air. We've had a glitch.'

'Just this once sir, we need the overtime.'

"Hello, A and E, which department do you need, stabbing, shooting or general GBH?"

"Whoa...not so fast! First of all please tell me your address, your health insurance number, and spell your name for me, Mr. HelpI'mBleedingToDeath."

Man with mobile phone says: 'I can't call for help, I'm filming this for the TV news.'

'I said he needs an ambulance! Not ambiance!'

'Which is it, Bill? You had a terrible accident and survived without a scratch. Or, you had a terrible accident and lost a lot of blood?'

"Do you know your name? Do you know where you are? Do you remember the accident? Do you know you had a hole in your underpants?"