Emergency Supplies Gifts

What can I get you, Mrs. Cohen? Two dozen cans of tuna, 15 bottled waters and a flashlight. Inflatable raft. Hurricane season beings again. I'll need a helipad delivered to my lawn.

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

Emergency Phone.

'I'm on my way!'

Emergency exit into Space

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

Don't worry, the first 30 years as a paramedic are the hardest.

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

Prepper Dog

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

'I'd say you're a little late...'

"Let me through - I'm a bonsai tree surgeon."

'If it don't hurt, don't mess with it!'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

'I've decided I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up.'

'Is it urgent?'

'Relax. This is only a test.'

'It was an exciting party, especially when the firemen came to put out the fire!'

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

Tsunami Evac Route

'Sorry, shortage of staff.'

'Should I call the auto club of the coast guard?'

"The blaze has taken hold on the eight floor Chief. The C.E.O., V.P. and C.O.O. are trapped in the boardroom!!"

'We have an emergency, ladies and gentlemen! We need help - can anybody in the audience play the tambourine.'

'I keep them around for unruly octopi, or giant radioactive spiders... you know, just in case.'