Embracing Modern Living Gifts

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

Crap from the future.

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

"I shop, therefore I am."

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

Weird things I do because of the internet

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Did you get my tweet?"

Snoopy with Laptop

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

The Modern Novel.

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

"Freshly ground pepper?"

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

Where do you see yourself five years from today, dork-boy? 43 Breen Road. What are you talking about? It's where everyone wants to go. It's the most popular AirBnB in San Francisco. The earliest opening they had was five years from today. Just book a hotel. Hotels are so 2007.

Tunnel of TV

i-teddy

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

'This is suppose to be progress.'

Fur Baby

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."