Elf Aficionado T-Shirts

"You must contact everyone who's ever been on your naughty/nice list."

Polar Bear fishing for elves.

Santa's Helpers

'Sorry - I left the naughty kid files on the train.'

Wallowing in elf pity...

'Well, enjoy your time off! Me, I'll be stuck looking at reindeer ass all night...'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Santa Claus aided down chimney by Elves.

"He's upset I'm getting 36,000 points for speeding in one night."

Elf with Christmas shopping

Elf

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

High security Santa's grotto

Elfie Stick

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

"That's our new church mascot."

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

The Suite Hereafter

"You run into a window, too?"

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

"I don't want any old ones, I want my own back..."

'Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?'

'Look Chaucer, there goes that rotten plagiarist Shakespeare again!'

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

"The x-rays came back, and — I'm sorry, but we found a very large attachment."

"They weren't kidding when they said a women's work is never done!"

Domestic event in the Zoological Gardens No. I. - The nose of the hippopotamus put out of joint by the young elephant