Elementary Prankster Pillows

Some recently de-classified nuclear secrets.

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

A cow poos down a hole.'UH-OH!'

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

Boy rolled into a snowball

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

'Court's in recess!'

"Open wide please! So I can get my hand out!"

Resourceful toddler

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Tamagotchi paralysis.

Dr, Wagner's dental floss spider web made going to the dentist much more appealing to kids,

Aaannd … Peekaboo!

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

Teddy Time Bears

"Ok, I found a secure line."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

Ooooh! Someone got a carrot job! Someone got a carrot job!

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'I did it all from memory.'

"Where's Waldo? Where's Waldo? Peek-a-boo! There he is!"

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

Clown Skis.

Tonite: Gala Costume Party. Got your costume for the big party? No, I'll just part my hair on the other side and go as my own reflection.

Teddy Bear