Elementary Prankster Gifts

Some recently de-classified nuclear secrets.

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

A cow poos down a hole.'UH-OH!'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

Boy rolled into a snowball

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

'Court's in recess!'

Resourceful toddler

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

"Open wide please! So I can get my hand out!"

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Tamagotchi paralysis.

Ooooh! Someone got a carrot job! Someone got a carrot job!

Teddy Time Bears

'I did it all from memory.'

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

"Ok, I found a secure line."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

Clown Skis.

Teddy Bear

'Outside with that!'