Electronics Store Employee Gifts

"I'm looking for a TV with a remote that has fewer buttons than my age."

"The curvature of the screen tricks the brain into perceiving that you're not overpaying."

'Super size me!!'

Pedestrian shuts off store window display.

'Why the extra bit on the screen?'

'They're all guaranteed to be obsolete by Boxing Day!'

'Do you have one with a mouse?'

'That's our latest in portables.'

Child as technical advisor

Sale! Weed Whackers

'Now I know why they threw in the printer for free. It's only got a resolution of one dot per 8 12 inches.'

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

'We have a P-O-P display for our new perfume. Can we move the beef jerky down a smidge?'

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

and this little light starts blinking when your computer becomes obsolete

'Better buy one now - before they make them too big to fit into your house.'

"Do you have anything by The Damned."

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

'Where do you keep the elbow-grease?'

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

Men's Prayer Group.

'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'

'It's an S.E.C. approved GPS system...'

'Yeah, we do cloud storage.'

"Proper I.Q. required"

"That's closer to the shade of taupe I want, but it's still not quite right!"

'Do you have any duck tape?'

Bob's DIY Store

'Wow, thanks for putting it into context. My 42-inch plasma really is obsolete.'

'Look, we have 7 and we have 5 . . . I make that 75 �' the number of your house!'

'I put an app on your computer to remove cookies and other thins slowing it down. It's like fiber for your computer.'

Do It Yourself Stores: Help Wanted

'This must be the work clothes section.'