Electronics Sales Assistant Gifts

'I need a universal remote.'

Killer Executive Suits.

"It's black, but it's not New York black."

'Now I know why they threw in the printer for free. It's only got a resolution of one dot per 8 12 inches.'

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

"'IF modom decides to change it' - don't you mean WHEN??"

and this little light starts blinking when your computer becomes obsolete

'Better buy one now - before they make them too big to fit into your house.'

'Please enter your pin now.'

'Gents toilet? Ah, got me there...'

"This new system is too complex...pass it on."

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

The Ultimate Sleeping Bag.

'Nothing to give him an excuse to say I smell like a cemetery'

'Don't just stand there doing nothing! Sell yourself a suit!'

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

'And it comes with an accompanying dictionary.'

'Don't worry, if you buy it, you don't have to wear it.'

'Super size me!!'

'I put an app on your computer to remove cookies and other thins slowing it down. It's like fiber for your computer.'

'Wow, thanks for putting it into context. My 42-inch plasma really is obsolete.'

Sales assistant: 'This sat-nav is free, but it does alter your route so that you travel past its sponsors' advertising billboards.'

"Have you been trying to fix this yourself."

Flat screen TVs and 3D TVs.

'How do you know he wants to go to college? Maybe he wants to be a sportscaster.'

"It's a novel about loss, and redemption, and fantastic sex."

'Don't just stand there doing nothing! Sell yourself a suit!'

"You know what they say, spend for the job that you want."

Museum - Mummy as a sales assistant.

"The curvature of the screen tricks the brain into perceiving that you're not overpaying."

"While we do appreciate your diligence... It's not the store's policy to shoot shoplifters!"

Consumer care and technologies

'What do you give to a man who has everything?' 'Antibiotics!'