Election Consultant Gifts

Oh, the usual...another Friday, another document dump.

"Would you like your MP not to stand at the next election?"

'If I were you Al, I'd seriously consider changing my name.'

Cannibalism and 'The Hunger Games.'

"Eeeeek!!! My okay to this one night stand must have been faked by Cambridge Analytica!!"

The Alt-Right in EU Elections

Trump Poutine

DUNVOTIN

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

"We've won control of the congress. Our next objective is to win control of the media."

'Son, voting isn't a rational procedure by which one strategically selects an electable candidate who will best serve your interests. Voting is an emotional response to your gut level fears!'

Vladimir Putin Pulling Trump Across The Table By His Tie

Thin Tank and Emote Tank.

"Do you take dark money?"

'I've changed my mind...I want to grow up to be a politician.'

Automatic Congressman

Think tanks.

'I know zero about the issue, so I can't be called a 'Washington insider'.'

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

"Our rule of thumb is: 'Keep it complicated' - so no one will understand how we choose a candidate."

The Election Strategy

"The poll results are in. Our lies are resonating with the public way more than our opponent's lies."

'I'm not saying I'm honest -- I'm saying that I'm afraid of getting caught!'

"If talk is cheap, why do candidates need super PACs to finance elections?"

'Our telephone 'get out the vote' drive reached everyone, unfortunately, they all voted for our opponent.'

'Bandwagon Marketing & Advertising... Specializing in political candidates.'

"Don't forget - I was manipulating the will of the people before manipulating the will of the people was cool."

"Hello there...! I'm your hardworking GOP Congressional Representative. I'm running for re-election and I would appreciate your support..."

I voted.

'I'm resigning -- so voters won't get the satisfaction of kicking me out of office!'

"Politicians can't make the trains run on time but they never miss the gravy train."

"Constant delays and confusion over Brexit are causing the firm huge problems. . ."

"Three years running 'fake news' websites? You're just what we're looking for!"

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

"I always forget. Is this the day we spin ahead one hour?"