Electioneering Expert Gifts

'I stopped paying attention to polls since a poll showed voters prefer someone who ignores the polls.'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"Away with the warmonger!"

"... And to our friends in the Liberal Democratic party I award thirty pieces of silver."

Trump Poutine

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

DUNVOTIN

"We've won control of the congress. Our next objective is to win control of the media."

'Son, voting isn't a rational procedure by which one strategically selects an electable candidate who will best serve your interests. Voting is an emotional response to your gut level fears!'

Vladimir Putin Pulling Trump Across The Table By His Tie

Thin Tank and Emote Tank.

Donald Trump Bulldozing Mexico, Canada, Panama, Bolivia, and Greenland

Putin's birthday cake - blowing up the world.

Arms race - USA and Russia.

"Do you take dark money?"

'I've changed my mind...I want to grow up to be a politician.'

Committee on Deficit Spending and Positive Spinning.

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

'I know zero about the issue, so I can't be called a 'Washington insider'.'

The spend is high

Cannibalism and 'The Hunger Games.'

"Our rule of thumb is: 'Keep it complicated' - so no one will understand how we choose a candidate."

Does it spark joy?

Vladimir Putin

The Election Strategy

'I'm not saying I'm honest -- I'm saying that I'm afraid of getting caught!'

"I always forget. Is this the day we spin ahead one hour?"

"The poll results are in. Our lies are resonating with the public way more than our opponent's lies."

Afghanistan: A rock and a hard place.

"If talk is cheap, why do candidates need super PACs to finance elections?"

"Hello there...! I'm your hardworking GOP Congressional Representative. I'm running for re-election and I would appreciate your support..."

I voted.

'I'm resigning -- so voters won't get the satisfaction of kicking me out of office!'

"Politicians can't make the trains run on time but they never miss the gravy train."

"Three years running 'fake news' websites? You're just what we're looking for!"