Elderly Charm Admirers Gifts

'Hot dang! Ethel, check out Raymond's new twenty-twos!'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"Call Harris back from retirement and ask him how we did things around here before computers."

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

'170 years old - and they look that age from day one!'

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

Four Stages of Christmas.

Boy throws a stick for a tortoise. By the time the tortoise returns, the boy is an old man.

Senior dating disasters.

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

Person Reading For Pleasure

"Son, you're old enough now to whittle your own condom."

Let me stand behind that one and you take my picture.

'Medical researchers discovered that the leading cause of death by aging is due to birthdays.'

"Hey, I don't see Harry Truman's name on the ballot!"

'I'd like to buy a frame that adds youth to a portrait.'

"They say you're only as old as your face."

'She was 50 years old and still didn't show her age...The same could not be said of her husband.'

"Wrinkles are the roadmap of a well lived life." "I think I've just found the M25."

A performance by the synchronized snow shovellers of scarsdale

"Fancy a bit of the other what, Reg?"

An Irishman unfamiliar with how a telephone works

Clark Gable

Angling Competition

"It was a golden age, a time of optimism and hope for the future, an age of enthusiasm and excitement...anything was possible!"

Chimney Sweep

"It's not outdated - it's retro."

Senior Pick-Up Lines

'Some of these are not birth marks...they're age spots.'

"I'm only attracted to older women."

Sag Nav

"I you want to know the age of my nan, just count the rings."

It had been many years since Mitch had given up on the idea that he might find his ideal companion...

Smoking Outside The Work Place.