Elder Rights Advocate Gifts

Old people sign - Whatever

"Apparently the problem of dealing with 'adult care' can be easily solved..."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

"Someone to see you!"

Sir Isaac Newton Sucks!

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

"Alright, Grandfather, let's check your ticker."

Potts is having a job keeping up with the young turks.

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

How to save money on geriatric care?

"He said he's doing all he can to help me, but he can't make me any younger. But I have no interest in getting younger! I just don't want to keep getting older."

'He steals from the drug companies and gives to the elderly!'

Face it, Sven, we're old - pillage doesn't mean what it used to mean.

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

The Leap of Faith Taken by Alzheimer's Caregivers

Angry pensioner

"Methuselah's been retired for over 800 years, but what is he retired from?"

"I appreciate you want to keep an eye on me, but is that really necessary?"

'The law requires me to tell you that we don't discriminate, gramps.'

After decades of research, Prof. Lorenzen finally found a way to stop ageing.

'Watch out for Harold Smedly...He has wandering long-reach pick up tools!..'

Heaven: Disabled Access

"Get off the lawn!"

Age Concern and Pension concerns.

Geriatrics struggle with a personnel shortage.

'Accelerate! Coffin Dodgers Crossing.'

Sadie's sick. Right. With laryngitis. Maybe something worse. She's got spots on her larynx. They did a biopsy. Oh no. She's in her 80s. She's planning for the worst. In case I die, I want you to know I don't like you. Just respect me.

'You look younger...are you colouring your hair?'

"I don't want your darn money! Get back here with that glass!"

Yeah, I'm taking care of my parents now, too.

"Working with the elderly requires significant capital investment....ramps, high raise chairs, alarms."

Alzheimer's and the Vicious Circle of Slow Death

"I assure you that you don't have Alzheimer's because you paid my fee last week."