Elder Care Enthusiast Pillows

'Try and stay alive until the government have finished their consultation process.'

Expensive nursing home

"The only reason he can remember what he had for lunch yesterday, is because it's still in his lap."

'He's my father and I say we dump him pricate...!'

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

Handle With Care

"Did you remember my mints?"

"Careful."

"I'm cleaning a little already, because the cleaning lady will be here soon!"

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

"I've made a list of lists we need to make."

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

My Mother Was Absolutely Certain She Would Not Succumb to Alzheimer's. She Was Wrong.

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

"Don't worry - the Power of Dad still trumps the Power of Attorney."

Gerontologist on the phone - 'Oh, you know ... same old, same old ... and how are things with you?'

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Caution Student Driver.

'Be assured about you mother's memory - we back up all the residents onto hard disk once a week.'

Fetch the Walker

"Would you care for a slice of lemon dribble cake Mr Dobbs?"

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

'When you get older everything hurts... and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

How to save money on geriatric care?

Care Home Eject Button.

I'm not sure when I can help you. It's not easy getting parts for you anymore

"My butt is loose!"

"Welcome to Mom's place. I'll be your waitress, dishwasher, and cook tonight..."

'Disease is inevitable. My advice is to find an illness you can live with...'

The Leap of Faith Taken by Alzheimer's Caregivers