Egyptian Enthusiasts Gifts

'Okay, folks, that's a wrap!'

Physician tending a mummy.

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

'Shoot, this is nothing, you should have seen how good we had it back in ancient Egypt.'

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Pyramid Handicap Parking

'We'll have to redesign it. Whenever the Pharoah's wife tries to sunbathe on the roof, she slides off.'

"Have your people call my people."

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

Curse or not, Dave had to pass this exam.

A mummy, in police tape, chases a police officer.

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

The Birth of the Pyramid Marketing Sales Scam (circa 4,000 BC)

The Mummy's Purse...

Mummy Busks For Coins For His Cases

'Thank goodness next week we'll be in a new dynasty and we can make some other style of pottery.'

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with a prostate!'

'So, Pharaoh, what sort of collateral do you have to put down on this $2 billion Great Pyramid you want to build?'

How to create a password you can remember...

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

'Oh no. The building inspector. He's worse than the Pharaoh.'

"Aha. . . the Sphinxter!"

'I know it's only a dummy run...but I'm telling you there's no wi fi signal in the tomb.'

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

'Mummy' clocking into to work

"Just so you know, I'm taking all this with me into the afterlife."

"We're pretty sure it's the West Nile Virus."

Fun on the pyramids

"Could you explain this 2500 year gap in your resume?"

Mummy Toilet Roll.