Eggnog Aficionado Gifts

"How do I know you're not going to turn around and spend it on eggnog?"

Farm Fresh Egg Nog.

'I'm delighted you enjoy t, but I'm afraid I cannot divulge the secret ingredient in our eggnog.'

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

hard-boiled egg...

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

"That's it. We’re toast."

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

You're the botanicals in my gin

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Al, why is my goldfish zigzagging? Perhaps sharing my beer with him was a case of misplaced generosity on my part.

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

Slices of bread rescuing burnt toast.

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"There are no such things as problems, only opportunities."

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

'Okay then, what's the price break on TWENTY drinks?'

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

Man at work sees in lounge refrigerator, 'Creative Juices'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

How lazy people decide what to eat

'How would you like your toast?'

A Pirate Egg Prisoner about to Walk the Plank into a boiling pot of water

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

"I hear you've a complaint about the eggs..."