Egg Inspector Gifts

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, just as long as it's Grade A."

All Natural Nothing

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"So! When's the big day?"

"Would you like me to warm up your eggs?"

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

The bad egg.

"You'll get right back over here if you know what's good for you!"

'Honey, you can't keep running to Daddy every time you find a little bug or something in your pool!'

"Congratulations, it looks like half a dozen."

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

Man domesticates the chicken (centuries later, eggs were found to be edible).

"Half a dozen brown—three large, three jumbo!"

Chef swatting flies into a bowl in a sushi bar.

"It says it's 100% ground beef. Only bones, brains, butts and eyeballs. Absolutely no pink slime added..."

'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.'

'If that is a toenail, it is a French toenail.'

'Why on Earth would you ask if this turkey is genetically modified?'

Food Uncertainty

"Freeze! We're taking a look at your additives, preservatives, artificial coloring..."

Bird and Worm.

'I hope you're hungry.'

'The food inspector, Sir!'

The food inspector

'What did you find in your soup?'