Educational Humorists Gifts

'Our new teacher's very ignorant. . .She's always asking questions.'

'I do know the capital of France. It's the letter 'F'!'

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

'It's basically a good master's thesis, but the word you want is 'serfs,' not 'smurfs.''

Finally I understand why it's called 'Higher Education!'

Math Teacher

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"Class, this is David. He's our new financial exchange student."

'People, get a half-life!'

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

"I'm sorry, but your child just isn't very sharp. But don't worry. It's perfectly natural."

"Look at her...Gracie is intelligent, optimistic, ambitious..I wish she was one more thing."

Geography class - UR Here.

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

"The battle of Gettysburg? Uh. . . let me check my civil war app."

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

'In the future, everyone will have fifteen minutes of tenure.'

'I'm taking the 'learn from my mistakes' approach to education.'

'We don't know what this is called'

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

"I don't know about you, but I don't like being a high school guidance counselor."

K-9 Garten

'The principal is keeping my teacher after school. She kicked the computer.'

"Every sixth grade substitute is offered an optional cyanide pill."

'This not exactly what I had in mind when I told him about the birds and the bees.'