Economic Traveler Gifts

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'He bowed lower for me than for you.'

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'He must be going economy!'

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

Cheapskate Cruises

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

Expensive greeting cards.

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

Airline Mergers.

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.

'I thought I'd never say this, but I think we might've traveled too far this time!'

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

Travel Agency. We can afford far, and we can afford wide, but we can't afford both.

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

Fiji. London. Africa. Travel co. They say you can't take it with you --- but you can't go anywhere without it either.

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

Europe on $5000 a day.

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

'The bouncing dot.com. bomb.'