Economic Thrill-seeker Gifts

'You've caught the acquisition fever.'

"Nobody understands you!!? Nobody understands you!!...do you blame them!?"

"On Wall Street, yesterday's panic selling was replaced by panic buying."

"These figures are a disaster, they show us going into free fall. A commercial armageddon... You'll all lose your jobs, your homes, you families will be desitute...begging on the streets! Although an alternative interpretation suggests a temporary slowdow

'Still no bailout for us, sir, but don't give up hope!'

Sell-Buy-Boom-Bust collisions.

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

"With this company, it's like 'Adventure Capital."

'You reached the Nervous Investor Fund's Hotline. The per share value is now 19.05, now 18.91, now...'

'Time to buy.'

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

Snowflake Investments...penny stocks, junk bonds: 'Here today, gone tomorrow!'

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

"Dow's up!"

"Stocks were bipolar today as delirious euphoria gave way to abject despair and back again."

'A few days away from those sharks on Wall Street will make all the difference.'

Yomp Investments - Big risks sometimes means BIG BUCKS!: 'I'm a little uneasy about the 'sometimes'...'

An extreme sports biker as a baby.

An explorer sees a sign in the jungle, which reads: 'You wiil be here'.

'Tax considerations? Regulatory climate? Labor costs? - Hell, no! We're moving our headquarters cross-country because I feel like it!'

'He has the Big Cheese on his side - But the High Muckity-Mucks will be with us.'

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."

'Stock Market re-entry now safe. . . City analysts say.'

It was a day of nosebleeds, stomach upset and right here, Dindley did a back-flip off his chair!

Jeff Sessions

'I find if I'm the first one in and the first one out, Ponzi schemes can be very lucrative.'

Bull Riding on the Stock Market

"You will note that their ability to comprehend, assess and process information increases dramatically when Professor Podhertz throws in the cat."

'This is Adventure Capital! You want Venture Capital two doors down.'

"This is what we recommend for motion sickness, due to the stockmarket's rollercoaster ride."

'And now, here's our own Ted Slimbuck to explain all those ups and downs in the stock market.'

Masochism for stockholders.

'Remember, there's nothing to fear, except fear itself and costly litigation.'

'He's chasing the market.'

'After I bought those stocks of Chinese companies, I felt greedy again in an hour.'