Eco-motorcyclist Gifts

Electric motorcycles

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"I love you too, big guy."

Politically Correct Snowperson

God's Subcontractors

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

Man using exercise bike being chased by dog

"It's called 'semelparity' darling. The salmon spawn then die, so we just need to wait at the spawning grounds to get an easy feed. It's all about sustainability."

Sale! Weed Whackers

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

"I think we have run out of time..."

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

Climate Change

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

"I solve mathematical problems, program electronic music, analyze environmental issues...but being a renaissance man isn't what it used to be."

"We sing her to sleep with songs about recycling."

Stuffing the turkey.

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

"I can’t remember the last time he hugged me!"

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

Plant Parenthood...

Look! There's a photo of our eco club's Earth Day actions in the newspaper! Sports. Power up the green machine!! I could use more copies. Me too. They're going to really power up my college applications.

'There is nobody else. I'm afraid we've wiped out all of the other species.'

Ecological balance.

Snowman has twisted, wonky carrot nose: 'Apparently, it's organic.'