Eco-motorcyclist Gifts

Electric motorcycles

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

Politically Correct Snowperson

"I love you too, big guy."

God's Subcontractors

Man using exercise bike being chased by dog

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

Sale! Weed Whackers

"It's called 'semelparity' darling. The salmon spawn then die, so we just need to wait at the spawning grounds to get an easy feed. It's all about sustainability."

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

"I think we have run out of time..."

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'

Climate Change

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

"I can’t remember the last time he hugged me!"

"I solve mathematical problems, program electronic music, analyze environmental issues...but being a renaissance man isn't what it used to be."

"We sing her to sleep with songs about recycling."

Stuffing the turkey.

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

'There is nobody else. I'm afraid we've wiped out all of the other species.'

Ecological balance.

Snowman has twisted, wonky carrot nose: 'Apparently, it's organic.'

"Tempting, but I'm on a plastic cleanse this week."