Eco-friendly Diner Gifts

"Just the steak for me and my friend will have the carbon dioxide and the water with the sunlight."

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

'It's an assault on the American family! At these prices, who's going to drive to grandmother's house for a thanksgiving dinner of tofu turkey?'

'They use paper plates.'

"Even the waiters here are organic."

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

"All our donuts are hand fried in what will eventually become biofuel."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

"Geoffrey's seasonal. I'm regional."

"I can't hurry when ordering. There's a lot of ecological geopolitics involved here."

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

"Strictly organic ingredients section or Russian roulette with genetically modified foods section?"

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

'Could I have the traditional Christmas dinner but without meat or dairy and could guarantee it's organic and GM free.'

Woman in Restaurant has Menu and Calorie Counter.

"We're making progress."

The only problem with your current diet is really deforestation, and I'm afraid I'm unable to help...

The early days of tofurkey.

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

"Is the parchment in the salmon en papillote humanely raised?"

"I eat the genetically modified flounder all the time and it's delicious."

Restaurant: Come & Get It! Bland Cuisine - 'Just plain food, good, but nothing fancy.'

"I'll get the onion soup... it's the only thing on the menu that I don't know why it's bad for me!"