Eco-conscious Mobster Gifts

"I feel guilty about this, Nicky. We really should be composting."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Bee flying to another flower.

We're cutting the forest in half, so I'm going to need you to make the oxygen of two trees.

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

"People! When you poison the last river, cut down the last tree - then you will understand that you cannot eat money."

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

"We've come all this way to destroy their planet only to find they're doing it themselves!!!"

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

"It's the new way of turning lemons into lemonade."

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

"It seems even the local council are aware of your drink problem."

"hmm. Mother Nature's definitely trying to tell us something here."

'I told you that roof turbine salesman was too pushy.'

There's no real oil emergency...

"Scientists don't know anything. . . but we need to leave this to those more qualified. . . like scientists!"

Man rolling the world across a shaky bridge between organic food and genetic food.

EXXON EXTINCTION

"Yep, it says "pesticide"! Not only are they trying to kill us, they also insult us by calling us pests!"

"Environmental Protection Agency. Scott Pruitt, Administrator."

No one drinks from fountains anymore. Thanks to bottled water, they've been replaced. By bottled water fountains.

"There - now we're environmentally responsible."

"In the near future climate change will cause huge disasters!. . . And if nature dares to disappoint me, I'll throw the packaging of my vegan burger into the bushes!"

COP26 GLASGOW

Food Pyramid.

Tree funeral.

'With such a tight budget we never thought it would be possible to build our dream home.'

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

Climate Catastrophism

Voting is about to start and they're campaigning furiously down there. The DNA is discussing policy in depth. DNA has detailed plans. The carbon dioxide is complaining about the negative press coverage its getting, and the chlorophyll is pushing a green agenda. The individual atom candidates are receiving lots of attention --- their truthfulness is being questioned. Voters must have heard that "atoms make up everything"!

'It's only now that we've chopped down all the trees that we can see the damage we've done.'

'Pssst! Dump your toxic wastes?'

'It took four trees to make that sign.'