Eco-conscious Joker Gifts

"To be environmentally responsible I'm recycling my sister's old book reports."

Dump truck resembling a shopping trolley.

"It's leftovers...you threw it up last night."

Stampede?

"Yep, it says "pesticide"! Not only are they trying to kill us, they also insult us by calling us pests!"

'What bait do you use for the old tires?'

'I jogged 120 miles last month and drank 3 gallons of wine. At 40 mpg, I'm doing more than my share for the energy crisis.'

Life on Earth - Champagne gas station.

"Wine with dinner tonight, Tom - and it's locally sourced!"

EU GreenWashing

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

Crisis Buzz.

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

EXXON EXTINCTION

'I told you that roof turbine salesman was too pushy.'

"I modified the symbol for accuracy."

There's no real oil emergency...

"Whoever pulls it out becomes King of Britain, but Phil licked the handle, so..."

Jim's Smart Kettle

'Pssst! Dump your toxic wastes?'

"I brought chips and cookies to snack on and baby carrots to sit unopened on the blanket."

'It took four trees to make that sign.'

'Why are you watching TV with the lights off?'

The nuclear power plant didn't doom the Snail Darter as feared.

Over-packaged fruit and vegetables

Football crazy

"I don't need roughage that badly!"

'Another advantage is everyone will have better tans.'

"Look! Now they offer healthy choices we can glance at before ordering our usual junk."

"Wine and women are off but can sing as much as you like!"

"Processed food was his undoing. He was eating a salad sandwich in the warehouse, when a pallet of pork pies fell on him!"

Warning: Eating this food could result in a decrease of health benefits