Eco Auditor Gifts

'It's okay, the chainsaw runs on biofuel.'

The Environmentalist

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"I love you too, big guy."

A tourist inadvertently destroying the place he is visiting

God's Subcontractors

"I sure hope there's something good in here. I worked up quite an appetite getting past that raccoon-proof lid."

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

Coexist. Coexhaust.

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

Tommy Cooper at the bottle bank - Glass, Bottle, Bottle, Glass..

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

"It says here that people can't live without soil. I knew it!"

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

There is No Planet C

"I think we have run out of time..."

Cat Panels. Cats soak up sun on rooftop like solar panels.

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

"Not to mention the park view."

Climate Change

The following wildlife film is sponsored in part by a grant from...Mother Nature Foundation.

The Corporate Trust: 'Since we have an agreement of transparency with the feds, I don't need to remind all of you that this meeting never happened.'

'But Honey, if we have kids, we won't be endangered anymore: We will lose all the social benefits and attention...'

'May the forest be with you.'

Look! There's a photo of our eco club's Earth Day actions in the newspaper! Sports. Power up the green machine!! I could use more copies. Me too. They're going to really power up my college applications.

"Turns that out! - We're supposed to be saving energy!!"

"The Nominees"

Pandora's boxes

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

"I can’t remember the last time he hugged me!"

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

"I solve mathematical problems, program electronic music, analyze environmental issues...but being a renaissance man isn't what it used to be."

Plant Parenthood...