Eccentric Academic Gifts

'I'm left brained and I needed some right brains.'

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

Use your imagination.

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

Blend Schools

"Pat's independently wealthy and dependably entertaining."

'He swallowed some of his acrylic paints and now he's artsy fartsy.'

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

'Ah, Baker! Still the company's lone voice in the wilderness, I see!'

The Haroplane

Lighting a Pipe

"Does anyone second the motion to make family meetings more informal?"

"He's nuts. She's nuts. All three young ones are nuts. The dog is nuts. And the old lady upstairs is nuts, too."

"Come at me, Bro!"

'Sale - monopole magnets - 50% off'

Sketchy Neighborhood

"Travis didn't believe in nouns."

"Whatever you do don't get onto the topic of his wacky socks."

"So, you found a way to triple the speed of our computer."

'...Joseph A.Peabody seeks out devious methods to add new excitement to his life.'

What Newton didn't see

Whacha Thinking About?

'Mix 1lb of greed with 2oz of corruption, fold in a sprinkle of ignorance then put on the shelf...'

"This is where your grandfather is buried."

"The whole world is crazy except for me and thee...and sometimes I wonder about thee!"

'Individuality - That's what counts in this game.'

Silhouettes

'Rodney, I don't know what to make of you. You're bored by excitement, and excited by boredom.'

"The Usual But With Some Added Creepyness"

"We had to remove him from public view."

'Doctor, before you meet the press to explain your theory about space aliens communicating with us, maybe you should take the tin foil off of your head.'