Eating Junk Food Pillows

'I guess I liked all the yelling and screaming and throwing popcorn best...'

'If you were a car, you'd be written off!'

'The problem with granddad buying hotdogs is we have to hear now cheap they were when he was a kid.'

"I received 9 months leave for an injury at work, then 6 months to recover from junk food poisoning while watching TV at home."

"Are you in denial about how much trashy TV and junk food you consume?"

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"We won!"

Homo Gamus

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

The Gospel According To Jane Brody"Orange, come in. Apple, come in. Hey you, frankfurter, hold it right there."

Menu Dating

"Is that your idea of a well balanced diet"

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

Fast Food Menu Selections

The Official Covid-19 Diet

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

'How can he be depressed when all he eats are Happy Meals?'

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

Sweet surprise.

"Mom lets me eat my fill of junk food as long as I can pronounce all the chemical ingredients."

'Forget worms. Think fast food.'

Fountain of Youth/Fountain of Bacon

Nutrition-Free Diet

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"