Early Parenthood Warriors Pillows

Parents sleeping on big pile of nappies while baby sleeps in bed

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

Baby pram as a tank

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

'We'll need lots of nappy changes today, the T. V. just said it's going to be wet and windy.'

'Stop pulling that silly face, Dear.'

"That's it young man. . . No more energy drinks for you!"

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'I'm not spoiled - I always smell like this.'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

'You've got the Vietnam 1000 yard stare. All new parents get it!'

"Has your mom tried turning him off and back on again?"

Toys in the DVD Player.

Buggy with Snowplow.

'Beware of teething baby.'

Woman telling her husband not to swear in front of the baby.

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

Woman feeding baby is covered in food.

"Jackson Pollock's diaper"

'Hey, Dad. We learned all about the Kama Sutra at school today... Oh no, not the Kama Sutra, I mean The Magna Carta.'

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

"No, I wasn't in a car accident. As a new parent, I'm still trying not to trip on all the toys on the floor."

"Good luck Mr. Bond, you have one minute to diffuse this tantrum."

"'Parent' should always be an action verb."

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'