Dueling History Nerd Gifts

Why do we have pistols? I thought we were back-to-back to see who is taller!

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'Einsteiners.'

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

Eurydice is bitten by a snake

"He conquered the known world - now all he's got is sudoku."

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Macbeth: Take Two

"Believe me it's only an apple."

Split Decision

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

"Perhaps it was too soon for a self-driving wheel."

Surge Plans.

Jane Austen Powers

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

Forensic evidence now proves that the shots in the balcony weren't meant for the President, but rather the show's cast.

They came...they saw...they conga'd.

Shakespeare actually had to paraphrase Julius Caesar's last words.

Trojan hitchhiker tries to hitch a lift from the'wooden horse'.

Theodore Roosevelt

E=MC2, 'You think you're pretty smart, don't you?'

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

The Thing That Won't Leave

Middle East - Abbas and Hanya

"Some dinosaurs died out more quickly than others" "You want some?"

"Don't worry - if we double the minimum wage it will still be nothing."

A Scene From 'Henry V'.

Not Moses

USA-China, trade war.