Dueling Fan Gifts

'This chair ain't big enough for the two of us...'

"We're never going to resolve this if you won't get your own sword."

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

Pre-Historic Gentleman's Duel

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"Skate or die."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

Golf Hole at bottom of lake.

Duel in a wheelchair.

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Wild West Text Showdown

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

'Don't forget the plan - When he gets weak from laughing - Hit him with your left!'

"Let's go slider, fastball, curve, beanball, fight, ejection, shower, beer."

'Work the jab! Move your feet! Attack, attack, attack! ...But be careful. He's got a human shield.'

Wrestling Champion.

Federal Employees Annual Easter Egg Hunt: 'This isn't fair - the CIA always wins!'

Frankie and Annette.

'Break a leg.' - 'Thanks a lot.'

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

'I'll teach you to call me a cowboy builder! Go for your gun!'

"Pistols at dawn?"

Businessman fences with three others.

'Look out for his low punches.'

'Agreed then? Your boy takes a dive in the fifth...'

'He has a great left hook,'

"And now the winner will be determined by a duel."

Angel and Devil Music.

"...and forget your damn sensitivity training."

'Such petulance!'

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"