Dry-humor In Art Gifts

"Yes, it's oil-paint: It's difficult to find water for watercolours around here..."

Madonna of the Pukes.

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

battered artist has painted picture of falling bomb.

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

'I beleive I have a new approach to psychotherapy, but, like everything else, the FDA tells me it first has to be tested on mice.'

Sea Horse outside saloon

"Oh, O.K. I can sort of see it."

Jackson Pollock - "Oh no! Someone's thrown paint all over it!"

"It's obviously an original."

Warhol Exhibit

'Have you considered drawing other people?'

'I'd say that our transport policy couldn't get any greener'

'... Get set... Wait! We forgot the water!'

Planet of the Ants

"Women do not appreciate power tools as last minute gift ideas."

"We live in the desert. What did you think I meant when I said it'd be a nice day to go boating?"

"It turns out I was having an affair and I didn't even know it."

Art Museum: Our exhibit of forgotten masters continues with What's His Name...

'I represent the Lilliput High School basketball team.'

"Tee hee. . . Turner Prize here I come. . .!"

A frog makes his own pond from tears.

Thinking about TV.

'First off, your average Paolozzi has far fewer holes than your Moore.'

Junk Art

Eagle attacking the Dove of Peace

A snowman executes another, but not in the fashion originally planned.

"My conceptual artwork - documented in these photographs - consists of my going on a bus to cleveland, buying a blue hat, putting three feathers on it, and throwing it off a bridge in Michigan."

Cubans against annexation to the USA

'You're messing with my head.'

"You're doing that thing again where you're my husband and you're next to me in bed."

The Blogger.