Driving Whiz Gifts

Learner driver practices on a treadmill.

The first car accident.

"You keep impeccable time."

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

Math Teacher

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

The Invention of the Wheel

You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it.

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

Free Printer with Purchase of Ink

'I need both hands for steering.'

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

'I cam for your obsolete operating system.'

"We can't just pluck figures out of the air any more. . . We use a bucket."

'Hey! -- I invented that, too!', 'It's that nut Al-Gor again.'

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

First Speeding Fine.

"Bangin’ rims. Sears?"

Millipede motorist

'Of course you're all for animal testing. You always get straight A's.'

"Be rational."

"Nah...not really...he's only won one game!" (Clever dog).

'And this is where we attempt to forecast the true size of the spending cuts!'

'Here's your problem. You're using third-generation software but you're a first-generation computer user.'

"Maybe we should stop making them on a hill."

'Excellent Hoskins, you've got all the right numbers, now shall we see if you can put them in the right order?'

"Yes, my automatic starter has the technology to start your car as well. I'll show you. Honey! Go start her car!"

"I'm going to call it zero."

"The last one to The Four Seasons picks up the check."

"I crunched the numbers and now they're so smooshed up I can't read them."